Thursday, December 4, 2008

Even Texters Get Wrong Numbers

Last Saturday as I was furiously trying to finish NaNoWriMo, I received a text message on my cell phone. Thinking it was from one of my sons, I opened it right away.

Aye do yu know the white girls lindsey number
(signed) The King

Huh. Somebody fishing for responses? Prank text? I ignored it and continued writing. An hour later, another text.

We have to go back to the libary and ditch myles. i dont want him with us
(signed) The King

Apparently this kid -- I mean, The King -- thinks he's texting someone else. I should correct him, but I think it's nice that he goes to the "libary" now and then. So many kids (my sons, specifically) never darken the door. I replied, trying to sound as cool as possible...

Dude, you're texting a wrong number. Good luck ditching Myles, I guess.

I mean, is it right to encourage this King kid to abandon someone? And will Myles be following them to the library only to be left high and dry, or are they escaping Myles by entering the library? Does Myles know the wealth of opportunity that awaits him inside his local public library? Forget this King dude, Myles! Go dig up something interesting on this rainy Saturday afternoon!

Who is this then
(signed) The King

Now I begin to wonder, is King texting a friend who's right next to him? (You've seen it. Kids text instead of whispering, right?) But if his compatriot is right there, how come King isn't grasping the fact that the buddy is not receiving these messages? I initially gave King high marks for using decent grammar and adequately complete sentences, and these indices inferred above-average intelligence. Was I overly optimistic? I'd better set him straight, anyway. I need to get back into my NaNo novel. Unfortunately, I'm still trying to exhibit my coolness...

Nobody you know. I'm a mom. It's unlikely we move in the same circles.

What do yu mean
(signed) The King

Yep, I went right over his head. If anything, maybe I sounded too cool at first, calling him "Dude" and everything. Poor King doesn't get it, and he's in the midst of a mad dash to the library anyway. I've distracted him and now he's flustered. Time to be direct.

Wrong number.

(signed) The King

Well, King gets good marks here for concluding our conversation with an apology. He's not such a bad guy after all. Lots of people can't spell "library" without stopping to think about it, and it is a lot faster to type the two-letter "yu" than to spell out the whole word. Although, if he were using T9, wouldn't "you" come out correctly? That means he might have been spelling everything letter by letter, as I do, and that brings his score even higher.

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